Even more Zambia!

Hi everyone!!!

So I've been beavering away here in Zambia. I counted, and I actually manage to teach sex ed to about 1,000 students each week. Plus, I finished Adam Smith's Wealth of Nations and - what was worse - Henry James' The Ambassadors. Which normally I wouldn't brag about, but it was such a slog that I feel I deserve some recognition. I've finished all of the fun, easy reading I brought with me and I'm on to the thicker material. (Eugene: the package has arrived, but the final stages of delivery are the opposite of logistically coordinated.)

Lately my experience - while continuing to be fun, relaxing, interesting and productive - has taken on a few more negative elements. Specifically, I'm homesick, and I miss Eugene and I can't wait to see my family (and all of you!). Also, I feel like the pace of learning new things has slowed. I already know how to cook nshima, hand-wash my clothes, and choose activities that work for classrooms of 60 10-year-olds. And finally, while I definitely think what I'm doing is productive and working, I'm not seeing what I would call a desperate situation. Sure, I live on less than $2 a day, like 45% of the world's population. But what they don't tell you is - the weather is terrific and the pace of life is relaxed and enjoyable. It's not really that big a deal.
Just as this opinion had crystallized, though, something very interesting happened. Deborah and I were talking about how she was mistreated by her stepmom when she was younger. (What happened sounded uncaring and uncomfortable, but it wasn't enough to get me really upset.) Always the pedagogic one, I asked Deborah what she thought about the fact that, as soon as she found a job after SPW, she, too, would be supporting people. Of course, I hoped to engender a conversation about how she would treat her dependents more kindly than her stepmom had treated her.

Silly me, thinking the question was theoretical. Deborah knows she'll be supporting people, and she knows who they are. I learned that Deborah's aunt supports five school-age children: her own son, Deborah's sister, and three cousins (two of whom are disabled, may I add - one is deaf and dumb and one is lame). She supports them by selling sex. Everyone knows what that means - she is not long for this world. May I add further that two of the cousins are disabled - one is deaf and dumb, the other is lame. Some days they eat, and some days they don't. I was appalled. There are so many things wrong with the story. Selling sex for money, AIDS, five dependents, disabilities ~ and my partner forced to assume this whole burden as soon as Chewe dies, which could be anytime. No other source of support on that side of the family is still alive.

*Then*, imagine this, a few days after I hear this story, aunt Chewe appears on our doorstep! We had just returned from an hour-long walk through the bush after teaching for a day at our extension school - we were exhausted - and we found her on our doorstep. I kept quiet while she and Deborah caught up, and even though I didn't understand the language she told the story in, I knew that her coming would not be good news. It turned out she had been evicted! There was too much back rent due on the single room the six of them share.

I thought about it. And I decided, here I am, with all of this money. Doesn't everyone deserve to have all their problems solved for them once in awhile - especially if you're a single mom supporting five kids, two of them disabled, by selling your body for sex?

And then... I didn't give her any money. Deborah never even asked - she's heard me turn down every single request for money I've gotten, and there have been tons. But this situation was different - or was it? I ended up convincing myself that, because I couldn't guarantee the money would be well used, and because I'm a "good person" enough already since I've donated seven months of my time to be here, and because I didn't want to get stuck supporting people forever - that it wasn't my responsibility to care financially for these people I don't know.

I think I may be wrong, right? Maybe I should just accept responsibility for these seven people for the next few-ish years? Or should I ask one of you, charming friends and family, to do it? Probably $200/month would do it - but commitment is essential, a windfall is no good.

So. Things are complicated as usual. As a foil to all of this real drama, I have the fascinating adventures of my fellow volunteers, who are struggling with juggling boyfriends, and the trouble they cause when ones you are no longer interested in show up on your doorstep, or you accidentally hook up with someone you don't care about in the presence of someone you do care about. Tee-hee, some things are the same all over the world, like the behavior of single 20-year-olds. =>

On the teaching side, we've been having some terrific classes. The syllabus says to do condom demonstrations to Grades 10-12, and only if the school agrees. I never asked the school what we were and were not allowed to do, and Deborah and I simply did condom demonstrations with every single class Grade 5 and up. Naturally, it was hilarious. We tossed around a water-filled condom and talked about how strong condoms are and how they have no holes. We blew them up like balloons. We discussed the importance of practicing before you put one on in front of a girl. We told students to steal them from their older brothers and sisters, and we guided them to the clinic that gives them away without questions, and away from the one that insists on an embarrassing consultation. This week, a few weeks later, we reviewed condoms and talked about the pill - available over the counter for 25 cents a month here!!! - but no one knows how to use it or that it's safe!! And we did a demo of the female condom - which I've never used before, but a well-informed doctor at the clinic says it feels nicer than using a male condom, but it makes plasticky noises during sex! Good stuff.

I'm coming home July 31. I can't wait.

These e-mails are posted on http://summerinzambia.blogspot.com by my charming and thoughtful sister, who also has her own blog (funny - with pictures!) about her adventures in Germany and South Africa at http://vorbild.blogspot.com. And Dulcy, my other sister with a blog (and a baby!) has her adventures in Turkey at http://www.ceng.metu.edu.tr/~ahmet/Dulcy/Blog/ (or via link from Audrey's blog.) The whole family - mom and Paul too - seem to be getting along well - at least as of a couple weeks ago ;)

Love to all,
Summer